Car Mats Switch Review

PlatformNintendo Switch
Release Date9/20/2022
Cost$3.99
PublisherSpacefarer Games
ESRB RatingM

Car Mats is supposed to be for kids, I think. However, its so bad that I don’t think kids will want to play with it. The idea is you play on one of five car mats, however, only one of them, the powerboat race, has any point to it. The rest, you just drive around a mat… and that’s it.

Those cops are foiled by a house.

In Police Chase, police are supposed to chase you. When they reach you, nothing happens. In Police Patrol, you patrol the streets as a cop and do nothing. On the Beware Trains map, a train drives around, and that’s it. It poses no threat to you, you even clip through most of the train cars. On Dogems(spelled correctly) you play bumper cars with no point or time limit. Only powerboat race has a point because its a race, but its easy and short.

This had about as much effort put in as the rest of the game.

As for the actual driving, its very loose and not very fun. Probably the most fun thing to do is to do doughnuts, leaving tire marks, but that gets old fast. The car AI is awful, often getting stuck on objects(as shown the first screen shot). The boat racers follow a predetermined path. The bumper cars all just drive at you(as shown below).

What the hell are those grey blobs supposed to be?

The game is ugly, just look at those shadows above. The sound is grating, just various car and train sounds… and that’s it.

I think this game would have been better off focusing on one very complex, entertaining car map, instead of five terrible ones. But considering the effort put in altogether, I doubt that would be very good either. Some car maps have health gauges for your car, others don’t, yet you can still explode. You can clip through some train cars, but not others. Why do the powerboats leave squeal marks in water? Why are the shadows grey?

This all just screams lazy cash grab from clueless parents…. and me, who paid money for it in order to review it. I really hope the developers enjoy their 4 dollars.

Overall: Lazy. Lazy. Lazy.

Nintendo Site

 
Add Comment

Bubble Shoot Farm Title Card

Bubble Shoot Farm Switch Game Review

Bubble Shoot Farm is not really a scam, but something is definitely fishy with Ruwamo games’ tactics.

 
Read More »

Hyper Torque Racing Switch Game Review

Hyper Torque Racing could use some more documentation or a tutorial, as this game is a hardcore racer.

 
Read More »

Speed or Death Switch Game Review

Speed or Die has great presentation, too bad the actual game is half-baked.

 
Read More »

Hentai Tales Volume 2 Switch Game Review

Hentai Tales Volume 2 is slightly better than Hentai Tales Volume 1 but only because stuff actually happens.

 
Read More »

Event Horizon: Space Defense Switch Game Review

Despite being rough in some areas, Event Horizon: Space Defense has a decent game play loop.

 
Read More »

Mom Simulator 2023 Switch Game Review

Mom Simulator 2023 is a series a thankless tasks over and over again. Pure monotony!

 
Read More »