The Game Slush Pile

Soulsland Switch Review

PlatformNintendo Switch
Release Date9/10/2022
PublisherNerd Games
ESRB RatingT

I am developing a theory that any 3D action game less than $10 is going to automatically stink. All the sub-$10 3D action games I’ve reviewed so far (including Wall of Insanity and Pandemic Shooter) were just not very good. You need a higher budget to make a good 3D action game, and Soulsland is no exception. It’s just the way it is.

13 levels that should have been condensed into five, maximum!

Soulsland starts out on a level-select screen with a seemingly wide array of options. But in fact, it doesn’t matter what you choose. The goal remains the same for each level, and they are all designed poorly. You fight through the level to a Lord Zaiden…

He’s actually two rooms over, sorry!

You fight him, you kill him, and then you find the level exit. End of story.

At least it’s not You’re Winner!

Where to begin with the suck in Soulsland? I guess the controls will do:

These cannot be changed

The control layout is awful and makes no sense at all. Weak attack is Y, strong attack is ZR, block is A and roll is R. It made my fingers hurt.

Now the levels. Let’s take Farm Town:

Gotta love that texture work!

That looks nothing like a farm town. I’m not quite sure what it is either, as there are no buildings.

Don’t worry, he never noticed me until I attacked.

The space station is slightly better designed:

At least it’s not an eyesore like some other levels

But the problem here is it’s tiny, like five rooms long, and yet, this is the largest and best designed room.

Now the actual game play in Soulsland is terrible because the controls are terrible. In addition, the enemies are easy and never change tactics, even Lord Zaiden. Some of them will pull out a bow, not shoot an arrow, and then use a sword attack on you. You will also never die because you get ten health potions which restock when you sit at a “bonfire.” I was on my 4th level before I even realized I could use a heavy attack.

SThey couldn’t actually be bothered to create an actual bonfire

Soulsland was attempting to be Dark Souls. Take note, I did not say it tried to be like Dark Souls; this game was literally trying to be a budget version of Dark Souls. However, Soulsland failed miserably at everything. It lacked the challenge, the great combat system, a deep and engaging world and lore, and what’s more, the collected souls don’t actually meaning anything at all.

I just light attacked my way to victory!

So looping back around, Soulsland is a ten-dollar action game, and therefore is unable to even be on the same continent as Dark Souls. However, I’d assume that even at twenty dollars, the game would still be a miserable mess. Steer clear.

Overall: Soulsland attempts to be Dark Souls on a budget. It doesn’t work.

Verdict: Garbage

E-Shop Page

P.S. Try Popeye for another game nearly as bad!

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