On 9/20/2022, I created the Game Slush Pile. It was a passion project to review the unreviewed. And a lot of the games I reviewed still are unreviewed except for me(and maybe Rushed Reviews… and SwitchStars) I reviewed great games and I reviewed trash so bad they still leave scars. So I will take it upon myself to list the best and worst Switch games of my first year. I’m doing this in lieu of a year-end feature since many of the games I review don’t come out in the year I review them. So without further ado, lets start with the three of the worst.
Worst #3: Soulsland
This game tried to be a Dark Souls clone on a budget, except it completely failed at everything. The graphics sucked. Game play was awful. The controls were painful. There was absolutely no redeeming qualities to this whatsoever. Whatever you do, do not play this.
Worst #2 Green Soldiers Heroes
Green Soldiers Heroes made me visibly angry. Charging $20 for complete garbage. Granted that is the point of the now well known tactic. You price a game high, then have it permanently on sale making people think they’re getting a value. I’m now numb to it, but at the time, I wasn’t, so I raged. And I recommended Wild Guns Reloaded instead, which is great and you should buy it.
Worst #1 Martial Knight
This technically got a Hilariously Awful verdict. However, that still doesn’t mean it isn’t the worst game I reviewed, because it isn’t a game at all. It’s standing there badly doing martial arts moves in the air, and nothing else. Even if you complete every training, you’ll be no closer to winning a fight. In fact, you’ll probably get your ass kicked. Save your money and skip this, trust me.
And now I’ll list the three best games I’ve reviewed, plus an honorable mention:
Honorable Mention: Slime Girl Smoothies
The nudie games drive the traffic, the most read reviews are almost all naughty games. So It makes sense that I should mention the best of them. Slime Girl Smoothies is the best kind of lewd game, where there’s titties, but also real game play. This is the real deal. So if you don’t mind the theme, go ahead and have great puzzling fun!
Best #3 N++
I was debating Tux and Fanny or The Oregon Trail for this spot. However, I ended up choosing N++ because I keep coming back to it. It is fun, challenging and addicting. It also has a rocking soundtrack. If you want pure platforming fun, you cannot go wrong with this.
Best #2 Needy Streamer Overload
Needy Streamer Overload is the most screwed up game I’ve ever played. The game is basically keeping a streamer from committing suicide. I called it more artistic than Gone Home. It also sold well upwards of a million copies. It’s more than Gone Home sold in five years. Therefore, I wouldn’t exactly call it unknown, but damn was it memorable.
Best #1 Army of Ruin
People who follow my site knew this was coming. The auto-shooter that kept me from giving Vampire Survivors a Must Play. While it hasn’t been updated since June, it really doesn’t need to be. It’s a complete package. It’s not perfect, no game is, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t a serious banger than I enjoyed more than Vampire Survivors. If you haven’t played this, what are you waiting for?
Where do I go from here? Well, I’m not quitting, that’s for sure. I’ll continue reviewing Switch games, and when the Switch 2 comes, I’ll switch over to that. I have a feeling Nintendo isn’t going to give up on the indie gravy train anytime soon. I’m also branching out into weekly editorials on the gaming topic of the day. I’ve already written two(one is on Starfield). They drive excellent traffic so I’m going to continue doing them. The short-lived retro reviews may even return!
Here’s to a great second year!